Posted tagged ‘bottle’

Quick Cooking 101: an introduction to Presto

April 23, 2008

Lest you think that cooking in 30 minutes or less was an invention of the Food Network, I’m here to tell you otherwise. There is every indication that quick cookery started as early as …

…hmm. I’m not sure – no date on the cookbook I found, sadly neglected, in the book swap at work. I’d put it at early 1950s.

But I guess it really doesn’t need a date, because the information it contains is timeless, not to mention priceless.

I mean get a load of this:

Where on earth are these vegetables grown, anyway?! I’ve certainly never come across corn and carrots which are the same size. Some weird post-nuclear accident?

But really, I shouldn’t jest. Maybe if I actually consult this book, I will acquire some gourmet hausfrau tips. As I leave my halcyon takeout-swilling chip-eating youth further and further behind, I’m increasingly worried that I am not the best helpmeet I could be. And if I start working on them now, I should be Queen of the Homemakers by 2010 when I turn 40!

And besides, the women all looked so happy back then!


Um… well, most of the time they did. Unfortunately, there is no caption for this picture. And check out the bottle!

I mean, I’ve never had kids, so I don’t really know… but it strikes me that it’s not appropriate to heat a baby bottle to boiling point. Am I wrong?

And… is that a fist I see hiding under the dishcloth?

Ah – it all makes sense now. This must be the missing caption:


“That’ll teach you for making me play ‘airplane’ for the 57th time today, kid… “

Would you just shut up and eat, already?!?!?!? If Mommy misses seeing Victor and Nikki’s fifth wedding on the Young and the Restless you’re going to your room until you turn 18 and I kick your worthless @$$ onto the street…”

And now for a short break from our sponsor… the back of the Presto book!
I want to be a model for a Presto ad!

Look how fun it is to do housework!!!

Hmm… I might not be dressed quite the part, though…


Maybe they’d go for something like this instead?

Um… maybe not. Unless, of course, the product is called “Mommy’s Dirty Little Secrets”…

Sigh – I’m not really picking up this hausfrau thing too swiftly, am I?

But what about the recipes? Well, I’m tired now. Check back tomorrow, wouldja?

Or, actually, Friday. Tomorrow I’ll give you one of my secret recipes instead.

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